Once 3 Sardars decided to go on a picnic.
When they get there, they realize that they had forgotten the soda.
The youngest Sardar said he would go home & get it if they wouldn't eat the snacks until he got back.
The other two agreed and wait patiently.
An hour went by,
Then a day,
followed by a week,
a month,
finally a year...
The 2 Sardars said
'oh, come on, let's eat the snacks'
...
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
....
Suddenly the Young Sardar popped up from behind a rock and said
'If you do like this, I won't go.'
Showing posts with label Sardar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sardar. Show all posts
The Smartest Sardar
A Sardar went hunting one day in Ontario and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home when he was confronted by a game warden who didn’t like Sardars.
The game warden ordered the Sardar to show his hunting license, and the Sardar pulled out a valid Ontario hunting license.
The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed its butt, and said, “This duck ain’t from Ontario.This is a Quebec duck. You got a Quebec huntin’ license,boy?”
The Sardar reached into his wallet and produced a Quebec hunting license.
The game warden looked at it, then reached over and grabbed the second duck, sniffed its butt, and said “This ain’t no Quebec duck.
This duck’s from Manitoba. You got a Manitoba license?”
The sardar reached into his wallet and produced a Manitoba hunting license. The warden then reached over and picked up the third duck, sniffed its butt, and said, “This ain’t no Manitoba duck. This here duck’s from Nova Scotia. You got a Nova Scotia huntin’ license?”
Again the Sardar reached into his wallet and brought out a Nova Scotia hunting license.
The game warden was extremely frustrated at this point, and he yelled at the Sardar “Just where the hell are you from?”
The Sardar smiled turned around, bent over, dropped his pants, and said, “You tell me, you’re the expert.”
The game warden ordered the Sardar to show his hunting license, and the Sardar pulled out a valid Ontario hunting license.
The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed its butt, and said, “This duck ain’t from Ontario.This is a Quebec duck. You got a Quebec huntin’ license,boy?”
The Sardar reached into his wallet and produced a Quebec hunting license.
The game warden looked at it, then reached over and grabbed the second duck, sniffed its butt, and said “This ain’t no Quebec duck.
This duck’s from Manitoba. You got a Manitoba license?”
The sardar reached into his wallet and produced a Manitoba hunting license. The warden then reached over and picked up the third duck, sniffed its butt, and said, “This ain’t no Manitoba duck. This here duck’s from Nova Scotia. You got a Nova Scotia huntin’ license?”
Again the Sardar reached into his wallet and brought out a Nova Scotia hunting license.
The game warden was extremely frustrated at this point, and he yelled at the Sardar “Just where the hell are you from?”
The Sardar smiled turned around, bent over, dropped his pants, and said, “You tell me, you’re the expert.”
Sardar's Weight Loss
The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would
lose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight,
but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
I'm 2400 kms from home.
Lie detector
An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test a lie detector . The Englishman says:
“I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Ok”, he says, “10 bottles”.
And the machine is silent.
The American says: “I think I can eat 15 hamburgers”.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Allright, 8 hamburgers”.
And the machine’s silent.
The Sardarji says:
“I think…”,
BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.
“I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Ok”, he says, “10 bottles”.
And the machine is silent.
The American says: “I think I can eat 15 hamburgers”.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Allright, 8 hamburgers”.
And the machine’s silent.
The Sardarji says:
“I think…”,
BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.
Recognizing a Sardar
You should be sure the person is Sardar when he:
• puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• tries to drown a fish in water.
• thinks socialism means partying.
• trips over a cordless phone.
• takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he puts
“Sagittarius.”.
• studies for a blood test and fails.
• sells the car for gas money.
• misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turns ground and
goes home.
• gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
• puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• tries to drown a fish in water.
• thinks socialism means partying.
• trips over a cordless phone.
• takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he puts
“Sagittarius.”.
• studies for a blood test and fails.
• sells the car for gas money.
• misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turns ground and
goes home.
• gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
Sardar commits suicide
Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks
and he takes along some wine and chicken with him. Somebody stops
him and asks "kyon bhai, ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?" (Why
do you take these things with you?).
Sardarji replies "Saali train late aati hai kahin bhook se na
marjaun" (If the stupid train comes late, I will die of hunger!)
Sardar in Udupi Restaurant
Sardar Santa Singh goes to a Udipi hotel to have something to eat. He orders for Masala Dosa. The waiter promptly gets him the dish but is surprised to see that Santa eats only the masala leaving the dosa behind.
Santa then orders for 1 plate Samosa. Again this time the waiter notices that Santa eats only the filling and not the shell. Waiter is very curious. Santa next orders for Batata Vada. This time around also Santa eats only the filling and leaves the shell behind.
The waiter is losing his patience and walking upto Santa asks him, "Sardarji, aap dish ke under ka hi cheez kyon khaa rahe ho, kya baki cheez pasand nahi aaya..?"(why are you eating the inside stuff don't you like the rest of it.)
Santa Singh says, "Arre bhaiyya, aisi baat nahi. Hamaari tabiyat kuch teekh nahi isliye doctor ne kaha ki baahar ka cheez mat khaya karo..."(I am not feeling so well so the doctor told me not to eat outside stuff.)
Sardar- Jokes "Detective"
A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question -
Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?
Sardar- Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.
Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?
Sardar- Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.
Curtain for Windows
Sardarji enters a store that sell curtains.
He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.
Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.
The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.
Sardarji replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"
Sardarji tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"
Sardarji says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"
A Teacher lecturing on population
In India after Every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up and says: we must find and stop her !!
A Sardar stands up and says: we must find and stop her !!